Blah

Need I say more?

Sooo...why am I updating? For no particular reason at all. Thus is the life of the one known as Ian.

As for writing? I'm inching along a small story I'll probably submit to some e-zine or something. Blah.

I just got an email from Beyond the Mundane informing me that I'll probably get a letter determining acceptance/rejection within the next three months. Talk about sucky.

Why am I a worthless speck dotted on the world that is the windshield of a broken down slug-bug? Simply because I think about writing and story ideas way too much more than I actually get down and DO IT. Now don't get me wrong--I write, oh I write. But I just think about it more--and it pisses me off!

But enough with that.

Life? Talk about bland. Other than regaining FULL CONTROL--*gasp!*--of my laptop, nothing INCREDIBLY special has come up, other than a project Kyle, Andrew and I are all working on. And no!--you may not know what the secret is! Bad! Don't you see the Confidentiality Sign?

If I'm weirding you out, good. That is my purpose.

I bid you good-day.

Forlorn Tower: A Novella

That's right. FT came in at almost 17k, a "legal" novella. Now that it isn't a short story, I plan on submitting it all on its own to a small press. I'm still editing it and I'll probably get finished with that tonight. After that, I'll submit it to the publisher I already got "interested," if that's what you wanna call it when they grant you permission to submit the story after querying.

But, yeah, that's really cool. A novella. *sighs deeply*

Also, JW Schnarr, a fellow budding author I met at The Undead messageboard, has granted me permission to link his blog and website to my sidebar. I have yet to read any of his work, but I do plan on it. He's a really nice guy, and a big zombie fan by the looks of it. If any of you have the time, pop in and say hello to the guy.

Also, I proposed another project to Kyle--loosely tied in with writing--but I'll wait until his decision before announcing it.

Stay tuned.

A new project

Friggin' awesome!

My friend Kyle and I have decided to collaberate on a western/horror story to submit to the above. It's gonna be cool. This is my first collaberation. It's pretty difficult because we don't really see each other EVERY day so we have to resort to emailing ideas to each other back and forth. It's good fun, though. Kyle's got a mind for good plot and characterization and I'm the grammatical freak of the two, with a few good attributes of my own.

If you guys haven't helped out with the tsunami yet, this would be a great way to do it. Kyle and I are really stoked about writing a kick-ass western/zombie story for a good cause. I recommend anyone--even those that don't write horror--to try this one out.

Ciao.

Plaguing the industry

"Journey's End" got rejected. Blah. Damn, I wanted to be included in that anthology. I'm workin' hard to shrug it off, though.

Well, I made a few revisions and sent it off to Lullaby Hearse, a horror magazine. I know I told you that before, but there was a bit of confusion with Permuted Press, so things got a bit whacked-out. Man, I'm just going hog-wild, aren't I?

I haven't been able to write diddly-crap all weekend. I can't even finish "Forlorn Tower" which only needs a few thousand more words! Gadzooks! Something about FT is just keeping me away from it, but I can't figure it out. I cranked out a few hundred words on it, all of them crap, and I just can't put my finger on what's going on with this damned story. I got it all planned out, just... *throws up his hands in defeat* I'll try again some time later this week.

I knew I had to write SOMEthing this weekend, so I crapped out half of a really short gladiator/arena story thing. I might just submit it to Silven Trumpeteer, or I might submit it to some other e-zine/magazine I find at Ralan. Damn, I love Ralan. I swear I'm addicted to it. I feel really guilty that I've been spending more time there than on Microsoft Word :p

I was going to see A Series of Unfortunate Events this weekend, but plans changed and I didn't. I guess that's what I get for going to see Darkness. Christ, that movie was HORRIBLE. Don't see it, please don't. The main character returns to a childhood house in Spain...but he has an IRISH accent?! Need I say more?

Anyway, I hope you all had a super-duper Martin Luther King Jr. Day. As for me, I sat back and watched Remember the Titans. Good movie.

Ciao.

PS: Two consecutive posts with the word "plague" in it? I swear I'm spelling out my future. Have mercy on me, flu.

In a world plagued of turnips and ranch dressing...

...there is only Ian Kappos, lone moron, with nothing better to do but update his blog.

So. Sent off "Billy Winston and the Nightflower" to Travel Guide to the Haunted Mid-Atlantic. Received email from Hungur Magazine asking me to notify them when I receive rejection/acception from anthology I submitted "Balthazar the Bloodletter" to. Did some other stuff, sprinkled with the love and joy of no internet all afternoon and homemade cookies.

Now I have to go interest myself in absolutely nothing. Such is life.

Supporting the small faction of starving writers...

...by buying a PDF version of Goblin Tails: The Anthology. Just to let you know, I probably would have eventually bought this even if I hadn't known a few of the authors who contributed a story to this wonderful anthology.

Anyway, this anthology is great fun. I haven't had so much fun exploring a colorful tapestry of a world since I first read The Rover by Mel Odom. It's awesome. I'm currently on Chris McCoy's second story, called "The Goblin, the Devil and the Wizard." The first one was good, but it was mainly an introduction, so I don't really think of it so much as a short story.

Aside from a few grammatical mistakes I came across, what I've read has been splendid. Can't wait to get to the rest. Also, when surfing around and clicking any link in clicking range, I came across Chris McCoy's blog and found a mention of a second Chuba anthology. I'm already waiting to buy it. I've got nothing but high hopes for Goblin Tails.

In other un-goblin-y news: I finished a historical vampire horror story set in the Civil War that I plan on submitting to "The Travel Guide to the Haunted Mid-Atlantic," a horror anthology being co-published by Permuted Press (The Undead) and The Mid-Atlantic Horror Association. *crosses fingers* I hope I can nail an acception on this one. To tell you the truth, I doubt it'll be accepted, as the story doesn't focus a lot on the area it's set (South Carolina) and that's mainly the anthology's theme. Ah, well. One's trash is another's treasure.

OH!--and I forgot to tell you guys: "Journey's End" was not rejected. Woot! It turns out that Jacob (the editor) had made a mistake and emailed me informing that JE had been rejected, when it was in fact "Exposure" that had been rejected. So JE is still buried somewhere in the "to read" pile. I'm really hoping this one gets through...

Wow! Another two-post day, eh? Goody gumdrops. Well, anyway, I plan on getting home some time within the next five hours, so until then I can continue to plan out a fantasy story I'll be submitting to a chapbook and...oh yeah, do homework. Grr. Damned education.

Ciao + 1.

Absolutely horrible.

A gay kid commited suicide three days ago at a school close by. Apparently his parents hadn't approved of his sexuality, and he'd also been pestered by fellow students. He shot himself at school. I know that kind of stuff happens all the time--unfortunately--but that's one of the saddest things I've ever heard.

I myself have attempted to commit suicide many times, but decided against it eventually every time. Stuff like my mom being a drug-addict for the majority of my childhood, my dad ODing six months before I was born, being taken away from my mom, and having visitation rights between three different families and having to keep all their opinions of each other from reaching the other's ears have all drove me to try suicide. Only the fact that I have loving and caring friends and family has kept me from doing it.

Now this kid, a homosexual kid, being driven to suicide after not being accepted by the majority of the people around him--not to mention his parents!--makes me feel horrible. A whole lot of shitty things have happened to me, and this kid must have had it tenfold. It makes me want to cry.

And why do people cast out gay people? Why do they drive them to this horrible end? Why do they drive ANYONE to this horrible end? Why is there all of the prejudice in the first place? I can't answer that, not fully. All I know is that since the beginning of time, people have hated and people have been afraid. That's why people, gay or whatever, get killed or kill themselves. Because of all this. It's fucking terrible.

I have absolutely no problem with homosexuals. I grew up in San Fran, for Christ's sake! I've met lots of "different" people--and most of them have been okay (except for the drug-addicts). Especially gay people--they're completely normal, really. They live life, pay their bills, eat the same food as you, and put their pants on one leg at a time. Just because their sexuality is different makes others feel revulsion. Why? Because you can't check out cheerleaders together or watch the same "nude scene" in a movie over and over again and both enjoy it? Because it's so utterly out-there to you that you can't deal with it? This is reality. Gay people aren't just gonna go away. They'll be a part of your life for the rest of your life, and somehow, some time, you'll have to deal with it.

I'm not sure I'm making total sense to all of you. I've got so many jumbled thoughts on this subject that it's hard to keep any idea straight before another pops into my head. I'm not even sure if I'm done ranting yet--I've got so much else to say on the topic, but I know this is a touchy subject and I won't try to "influence" anyone, or however you want to say it.

The main subject was why people make others so goddamn depressed. Sexuality aside. I have two clinically depressed friends, one of which is suicidal, and that I care about very much. She's had a tough life too, and some people around her--her family, mainly--don't really understand the way she is, that she's bisexual, that she has very philosophical views that not many people around her agree with, that she's a very depressed person in the first place. And no one except her boyfriend and I really understand her. We're the only people she can talk to, and it makes me feel sad that this kid--the guy who commited suicide--had no one to go to, no one to talk to. And I'm very glad that my friend at least has two very caring people in her life that she can talk to, and I'm very grateful to be one of them. She's thankful too, I'm sure.

Guys, if you have any friends that you suspect may be depressed, talk to them. You may not even notice the crap they're going through in their lives, and they could end up like that kid at that school. Be a good friend and help them out. They need it. Be grateful for the friends you have, and do what you can to keep them alive and well, physically and mentally.

Again, I could add so much more to this, but I'm sure most of you are pretty tired of reading my extremely long rants, so I'll end it at that.

Ciao.

Worlds of D&D

Found a link over at Candlekeep of this AWESOME new messageboard. Check it out--they've got discussion on all sorts of WotC gaming worlds, their novels, and everything else related to D&D.

I'll be adding it to the "Messageboards" list shortly. If anyone's interested, my user name is Ronk the Rancid.

Ed is Dead

Wake up, buddy! *taps glass* He isn't moving. Hmm...fetch me the hammer...this could take a while.

Of Persistence and Honesty

Writing update: Fixed up "Journey's End" and sent it to a magazine called Lullaby Hearse today. Still working on "Forlorn Tower"--it's up to almost 12k words now and still going. Awaiting replies from a couple of magazines/anthologies on a couple works I sent to them.

Kameron recently pointed out that it wasn't very smart to have sent my story "Balthazar the Bloodletter" to two different publishers. Winner of the Maiden of Pain open-call, I succumb to your wisdom. After thinking about it (for the first time, sadly) I realized that what he said was indeed true. Luckily, I notified the magazine I sent the story to that I'd sent the story to another publisher, so hopefully they got rid of it.

Now that that's cleared, lemme talk about something quite different. Recently I read over some of my previous posts and noticed just how much of an idiot I made myself sound in some instenses--maybe from incorrect spelling or grammar, or just from plain ole manner. I am ashamed. I know that I have some authors that come by here (Kameron Franklin and Ed Gentry, to name a couple) and to have seen mistakes like that posted on this blog makes me feel like a complete moron. Seriously, it does. And I really hope that those authors that do drop by haven't let those errors affect their opinion of me. Usually I'm a freak about grammar and spelling (just ask my friend Kyle) and I'm pretty aware of my behavior. Actually, I'm not sure if my behavior has been inappropriate in previous posts--it didn't seem too bad to me, but I tried looking at it at a different view and saw some things that I said could have had a viewer feel that I was really stupid or immature. If I have done that, I apologize, and vow to clean up my act.

There really isn't much else to say. Kyle, his dad, and I had an awesome weekend together--in that we all screwed around, had actual intelligent conversations *gasp*, and burned each other punk CDs. Very cool. Yesterday I went to my cousin John's 8th birthday, and ever since I've been wondering whether it's wrong or not to be attracted to a cousin the same age as you that's on your uncle's (NOT blood-related) side of the family. The girl's like my aunt's husband's sister's daughter. If it's wrong, I'll get some pills or something, because that truly is freaky. Someone told me that I'm about as related to her as a neighbor, but I'm iffy. Anyway, I think I better stop talking about this. It's freaking me out and bound to lose me a few viewers.

Well, that's it. Bye-bye, people.

The Authornator

I got my rejection letter from Permuted Press (The Undead) yesterday on "Journey's End." For some reason I didn't really react; I'd already really predicted that it'd get rejected--the beginning was choppy and the ending was a nosedive, if you know what I mean.

Still awaiting my rejection letter about "Exposure," but for some reason I haven't gotten it yet, which is weird because I submitted it two months before submitting "Journey's End." Either they haven't read it yet, or they're considering accepting it, which is highly unlikely. "Exposure" sucked, just to put it lightly. Sucked MAJOR. No plot. Absolutely no character development. And a whole lot more useless crap that I stuck in there on a whim. It was shite on a stick. Turd in a salad bowl. Poopoo on a platter. All that.

Over break I submitted an old fantasy story of mine entitled "A Wizard's Revenge" (which runs just over 2k words) to The Goblin Reader. I'm also waiting for a reply from Beyond the Mundane on "Balthazar the Bloodletter," which, according to popular opinion, is another crap caserolle (or however you spell that acursed word). Just for @$*&s and giggles, I submitted BtB to Hungur Magazine, a Vampire Only magazine. So if Beyond the Mundane rejects BtB, I've got a great back-up. And if both accept, I'll flip a coin.

So. New term. Woot. New classes. Woot + 1. I've got Algebra 1A again for some stupid reason, seeing as how I managed to raise my D in that class to C+ in just two weeks. I'll get it worked out. Also, because of my amazing display of effort on the Photography final among other things, Ms. Everett--my photo teacher that took waaaay too much crap from me that term--passed me. Friggin' awesome! *does victory dance*

Anyway, on to my ***new*** classes. I'm still in Newspaper, which is cool. I've got some weird World Geography class that isn't even required for a freshman for third period, and it's being taught by the principal himself! No matter. The principal loves me and I'm a Geography GENIUS. Seriously. Well, I've also got a kick-ass English class for my last class. It's awesome. The teacher--Ms. Cuellar--is really effin' cool because she loves Nirvana and one of my dad's old punk bands, The Hot Spit Dancers, and she's got an enjoyable class. Woohoo. Big change there.

FT--"Forlorn Tower" for those of you that don't remember or never cared--is coming along well. It's almost at ten thousand words right now. It'll probably end up somewhere around 14k. Yay. Longest story. And not only will it be my longest, it's some of my best writing EVER. Kyle freaking loves it. And I love it. And I love writing it. It's all great. It's weird because I've been writing it on and off for a while now and I've NEVER got tired of it. And that is especially odd because I usually trash anything that I don't give a crap about anymore. Anyway, I'll probably submit it to Black Gate magazine, which I hear is very cool.

And despite how long this post is turning out, I'm gonna get back to talking about "Journey's End," just so you guys can hear more of my pointless rants. Cool, huh? You bet your bottom dollar. Talleeho! Onto "Journey's End."

JE was cool. I loved writing it. I got a lot of praise on it, actually. Some of my scenes that were intended to be scary ACTUALLY WERE scary! *gasps* Wow! I never thought I could do it! I am truly proud of that particular piece of writing, even if it did get rejected. And when it got rejected I felt really good about myself. You wanna know why? Because I felt like an author. I had done all the writing, I'd edited, and I'd sent it off to a publisher. Don't ask me why I feel any more like an author now than I did ere this post. It's just the whole feeling that I was actually doing something with myself--I was writing and sending off work to publishers! You guys might not get why I feel so good about myself, and I understand. It probably all sounds stupid, but it's how I feel. I feel like an author, even if I'm not technically published, though I vow (vow) that I will get published one day, because I'll never ever give up writing, no matter what. And I've never been more sure of something in my life. I'm a quitter, but I'm not giving this up. I'll be here for a long time, folks. A long, long time. Because I am The Authornator.

Rant over. I hope you guys enjoyed that mismatched essay of mismatched stuff. And if any of the subjects I bring up sound tedious to you, too bad. Because it'll be happening a lot more, don't doubt it.

Ian out.